The Pillsbury Doughboy (aka Poppin' Fresh) died of a yeast infection and trauma complications from repeated pokes in the belly.
Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin.
Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, the California Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, and Captain Crunch. The grave site was piled high with flours. Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy and lovingly described Doughboy as a man "who never knew how much he was kneaded" and who "held a warm place in all our hearts."
Born and bread in Minnesota on March 18, 1965, Doughboy rose quickly in show business as a Pillsbury spokesman, but his later life was filled with turnovers. He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting his dough on half-baked schemes conned by those who buttered him up.
Despite being a little flaky at times, he still was a crusty old man, and was considered a positive roll model for millions. Toward the end, it was thought he would rise again, but alas, he remained unleavened.
Doughboy is survived by his wife Poppie-Fresh, children John Dough, Jane Dough, and Dosey Dough, plus they had one in the oven. He is also survived by his elderly parents, Granmommer and Granpopper, and Uncle Rollie.
The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes.
May he rest in yeast.