1. The cat is entitled to go outside anytime he wants! Humans shall make no law respecting an establishment of boundaries or prohibiting the free exercise therein, or abridging the freedom of access, or the right to peaceful assembly.
2. The cat is entitled to eat anytime he wants! A well-carried provisional chamber, being necessary to the fulfillment of a feline's whims, shall not be infringed.
3. The cat is entitled to sleep anytime he wants! The right of the feline to be secure in their domain and effects against unreasonable discomposure, shall not be violated.
4. The cat is entitled to sleep anywhere he wants! Humans shall issue no warrants or decrees or edicts as prescribed to the demarcation of possessions or property which are in direct conflict with right of life, liberty and the pursuit of feline affirmation.
5. Cats can do anything they want as long as it's cute! The feline shall be immune to all criminal accusations, indictments and complaints. The accused shall enjoy the right to a speedy and impartial dismissal of any and all charges provided said feline's compulsory right to obtain any or all witnesses, including character witnesses, are obtained in his favor.
6. What I say goes! (And I say feed me... Again.) Neither serfdom, vassalage, or involuntary servitude will be tolerated, except by said cats in proprietorship of their humans.
7. No dogs in the house without my permission! No Canis familiaris shall, in time of peace or at any other time, be quartered in any dwelling without the consent of the potentate, nor in time of war, but in a manner to be prescribed by sovereign.
8. Don't disturb me when I am sleeping! The right of the feline to be protected against unreasonable search and seizures shall not be breached or infringed upon at anytime or any place.